Those ill-advised individuals who follow my blog know that I don’t have a life. It won’t therefore come as a surprise that in the balancing act, my highs of the last year are pretty low. Perhaps not incidentally, they are all associated with WordPress in one way or another.

In 2017 I did not get featured on Discover, or whatever they call Freshly Pressed now. I used to covet this caveat before I discovered (and freshly pressed) that I’m too subversive to get publicised anywhere (unless I invite myself, see further below).

On a side note, I’m so wiped these days that I spent five minutes trying to remember the word subversive. It’s ridiculous because, as I rarely fail to mention, I have a PhD in literature (in-yer-face), and, furthermore (and is the same as furthermore, hence it’s pleonasm—I am aware of it and yes, I just spent five more minutes trying to remember the word pleonasm), subversive is my middle name. (Kidding. Slavs don’t get middle names.)

What I did in 2017, however, was WordPress user testing. You might or might not remember my enthusiastic, carefully crafted (and subversive) post on my experience. If you missed it, read it (because I wasted so much time and effort making the post), and if you’re not up to it, please be advised that user testing didn’t involve testing on humans (or pets). Wait. It did. Never mind.

IMG_20171115_193907-01

Picking my poison

What I got from this user testing (no humans or cats were harmed in the process, or not too much anyway), was an Amazon gift card (I’ll be buying self-help books on how to make myself, the world and the web a better place) and a one-year extension of my WordPress subscription. Hey, I got to do what I love and I got rewarded for that! Now, that I call a sweet deal.

My another not-too-dazzling highlight was when I was a speaker at WordCamp. Keep your pants on, though, it’s not what it looks. There indeed was a national WordCamp in my area and I did actually speak on the stage, but it was part of lightning talks, a free-form session in which volunteers from the audience were encouraged to come up and talk. No one volunteered but I invited myself (see above for not getting invited anywhere unless I invite myself).

I blame the great coffee that they offered for free (well, included in the price of the ticket) at the event. Considerably better than my generic brand coffee. IT people are known for their coffee after all. (I’ll start buying better coffee when I earn as much as IT people.) Well, where was I? I took the microphone fearlessly (I was high on caffeine and anti-anxiety meds) and said: “They say that each day, you should do something you’re scared of. So I guess I can check this box for today.”

The audience was well pleased and applauded me, but, much to their dismay, I went on and couldn’t be stopped. I have photos to prove it. I won’t be posting them here because that would not be exactly in keeping with my idea of blogging anonymously and enjoying the privileges that come with it. Duh. Huh. So these were my WordPress highlights. That’s all, guys. I’m going to get high on caffeine or benzodiazepine, I’m not sure which yet.

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Posted by Mara Eastern

I'm a sardonic blogger, snapper, scribbler and rhymer; a virtual space invader who indulges in cheerful negativism, morbid self-deprecation and bleak humour.

14 Comments

  1. I do love your posts. Is she serious? Is she kidding? Oh, pfft–it’s Mara. One of the cooler kids on WP. Damn. A free one-year extension on WP. Pretty sweet, alright.

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    1. Thank you for your superlatives, I’ll print them out and pin them on my corkboard… ❤ Well, I’m always a bit tongue-in-cheek but all I write is basically true. Almost true. Sort of true. You know.

      Liked by 1 person

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  2. That’s an impressive year of WP accomplishments. Far more than mine !!

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    1. Well, I could’ve done better, but I guess I could’ve done worse too! So all’s well in the end.

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      1. There’s always room for improvement no matter what! I think you did good 🙂

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        1. True! That’s a good way to look at it.

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  3. Great stuff! I used to be such a WordPress enthusiast … don’t know what happened?! I lost it! I know the word ‘subversive’, but have never felt the urge (or need) to use it. How exciting you got to a WordCamp! I would have gone too, during my enthusiastic phase. How do you get high on coffee and/or benzodiazepine? The former does nothing for me (except in the morning to help me wake up) and the latter puts me to sleep.

    While writing this comment, I once again feel that urge to get back into the blogosphere, but I would want to start over … totally anonymous.

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    1. Oh well, interests come and go, no need to worry about that! I use WP also for work, the self-hosted version, so it was part personal and part professional interest that led me to a WP conference. It was great, an awesome atmosphere and lots of interesting info.

      How I get high on coffee and benzos: coffee is a huge trigger for my anxiety, so I try to drink little of it, and when I have too much, I’m either shaking or I’m feeling full of energy, which isn’t my usual state, so it’s like a high. The same with benzos. I’m usually feeling anxious and in pain physically, so when I take one and I feel better, it’s so amazing that it’s like being high.

      I’m so glad I started to blog anonymously, and I have no desire to change it. Funnily, what I post anonymously here is most authentic and most true to me.

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      1. About the last paragraph: it would be for me too. Sometimes I even feel I’m more authentic in comments than my own blog posts. Like … right now LOL

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        1. It’s good to know. Perhaps you’ll start a new anonymous project 😉 But you’d have to tell me about it! I’m the last person to judge anyone for authenticity.

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          1. Oh I will, for sure. Still toying with the idea … how to write, in order not to give myself away …

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          2. On this note, here’s a cautionary story of how I got found out: my Mara Instagram account, connected of course to my real-life phone number, popped out as a suggestion to my friend when she joined Instagram. The first photo on my account at that point was a picture of my tattoo, so she easily identified it was me. Then she followed the link to my blog, and here goes my secret… It’s not that anything bad happened.

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          3. Yes! That’s something to think about … not to connect anything if one wants to stay anonymous. The writing itself could be tiresome, as one would have to think all the time about stuff that could give one away.

            I’m beginning to doubt it’s worth it. LOL

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          4. Well, that’s up to you, but since we’ve established we’re masochists…

            Liked by 1 person

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