I’m Hot: Here’s Proof

14 comments

Today, I woke up hot. Not sexy hot (because I’m always that — wishful positive thinking), but hot hot. If you’ve been so unfortunate and bored as to follow my complaints about malfunctioning radiators, you’ll be surprised to hear this. I was surprised to feel this. At first, I thought I’ve grown tough and got used to being constantly at the brink of dying of exposure.

So I hopped off to take my morning shower, positively beaming with hotness, and as I reached for my towel, I burnt my hand on the radiator. This made me and the cat jump. What’s just happened? How has the radiator that was ice-cold like my heart yesterday become as boiling as my brain today? Have I taken one pill too many? Have I slept through winter and is it summer again?

It remains a mystery. The most logical explanation is that the radiator man who failed to come yesterday because he was playing Godot fixed my radiator remotely. I know it doesn’t make sense. If you have a more reasonable explanation, go ahead and tell me. Also, if you’ve sent me blankets, I’m good now. Instead, you can send thongs. If thongs are flip-flops for you, please send me European size 38, smart look. If thongs are panties for you, please give me size XS, cute look. Thank you.

Here’s the ultimate proof that I’m hot. I was practising my morning yoga barefoot. I am aware that yoga shall always be practised barefoot, but that doesn’t bar me from wearing toeless socks when it’s cold.

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14 comments on “I’m Hot: Here’s Proof”

  1. Well, there’s that theory out the window…re hotness…lol…I always have a laugh when people talk about flip flops…what a weird name when a pair of thongs seems much simpler….anyway I hope your heating issues are resolved soon….I think you are too young to be having hot flushes…

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    1. Hmm, I prefer the word flip flops for the footwear, it’s so onomatopoeic and I instantly picture the right thing!

      No, I’m not having hot flushes, not ever. I have cold flushes though, does it count?

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Cold flushes I imagine are the ones you have when the heater stops working…
        In Australia thongs are what you wear on your feet and undies on your bum…

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  2. You’re making me remember how miserable I was to live in the cold and thusly move to Florida. I will never again, and rarely if ever, complain of the heat. Enjoy the warmth!

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