What I Hated (the Least) Today 244/365: Bug Infestation

I’m afraid of bugs. Really afraid. Irrationally afraid, as most rational people are. Don’t try to explain to me that bugs are harmless. Whatever sends me in a hysterical fit that makes your hysterical ex look like a sensible, calm and balanced person is the opposite of harmless.

In latest news, the bugs of the world are closing in on me. They have united for a common goal: to kill me. Or, at least, to make me quit smoking because they aggregate at the balcony which I use solely for smoking. I put up a BEWARE OF INSECTICIDE sign but the bugs ignore it because they are dumb. Or they are clever and know that I’m too scared of them to use insecticide on them because it doesn’t kill instantly.

It started creepily with a creepy spider. It would creep out on the balcony each night, for several nights in a row, and disappear with the morning dawn. I’m not sure that I want to know where it went at daytime. Probably to the nearby cemetery to sleep in a coffin because it was obviously a vampire spider. Not only did it prefer the night but it also sucked, that’s why.

Then the spider disappeared for good and my balcony graduated to a moth. While I could tolerate the spider without excessive hysterics, a moth is more than I can bear. That’s what I’m most scared of. The trouble with moths is that, like me, they are hysterical and suicidal. You know how they spend their whole lives madly fluttering around a source of light until they merge with it only to get incarcerated.

The moth also frequented the balcony for several nights in a row. Its presence didn’t prevent me from smoking but reduced me to a ruin. I’d smoke with my eyes fixed on the moth, lest it should move and come for me. At one moment, I thought it was actually plunging itself at me and I jerked so hard and fast that I pulled a muscle in my shoulder.

Totally freaked out, I looked at my hand and thought the moth was sitting on it. Of course, I started flailing frantically, agitating the moth that was actually sitting on the wall, and then I realised the dark something on my hand was my tattoo.

Ready to die from fear, I quickly slid inside, making sure the moth didn’t follow. Unnerved to the extreme, the first thing when I was inside was to step on the cat, who has the bad habit of being always under my feet. I screamed, the cat screamed (nothing happened to her, she’s such a drama queen) and I proceeded to take an anti-anxiety pill. Not minding what I’m doing, I nearly took a sleeping pill instead.

It’s not like I’m for genocide but please, universe, make all moths die. It’s either them or me.

28 thoughts on “What I Hated (the Least) Today 244/365: Bug Infestation

  1. I am actually quite fond of minibeasts and bugs – though I don’t like to touch worms, slugs or snails – but I don’t like having lots of moths or butterflies flying around my face. I am seriously happier with bats sweeping over my head than I am with moths getting in my face. One or two are fine but a whole flock (collective noun for moths?) fluttering in my face is just too much.

    Coincidentally, I have some bug experiences from today too. Firstly, a butterfly landed on my hand when I was at work and sat there for several minutes. Secondly, and much less pleasingly, I learned that I have an infestation of carpenter ants in the sill of my bay window. On Monday, they will all DIE!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It’s funny, the things we’re afraid of for no reason. A family member is terribly afraid of mice – which is ridiculous, he’s a police officer… I don’t mind rodents, I used to have a cute pet mice.

      Butterflies and moths are all the same to me. I’m horribly scared of them. I don’t like the fluttering wings. Fortunately, I never had much trouble with ants. I hope that yours will enjoy the last few days remaining from their lives…

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I don’t like spiders either and they don’t live long at my place….but it doesn’t matter as I’ve given up trying to rid my world of them. In the hot months around Christmas we get what we call christmas beetles who will flock to any external light that is on. Then they sit on the ground under the light and I’m sure bath in the warmth of the light but they place themselves in the way of my size ten shoes…if you get my drift here. At present I have mice back in my house, baits are out and with a bit of luck they’ll eat the baits and disappear..the baits I use must be particularly tasty as they often take the entire bait away with them. As for cockroaches, don’t get me started…

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    1. I can’t begin to imagine what I would do if I lived in Australia, where I understand all bugs are super huge and super nasty. Cockroaches, ugh, I only saw a live one once in my life – at a zoo! (Though I did wonder why the heck to keep a cockroach at a zoo. Like anyone wants to see it.)

      You need to get a cat for your mice infestation. Or stop putting fancy cheese in the traps! I wish us all a bug-free day/week/life!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Its all relative isn’t it….my spiders exist out of sight most of the time and know its not good policy to be seen. Each morning I take a dust pan and brush and collect all or any cockroaches who has passed away during the night. As for the mice I’ve stopped using traps and now use baits which I’m finding far more effective and I don’t get to find them in my house. Most people in Australia who die from the beasts and bugs about do so because of their own stupidity, like swimming in a river which has large signs warning of crocodiles.
        I do hope your week is bug free.

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        1. You spend your mornings clearing away the body of cockroaches?! Oh dear. What a life. I spend my mornings cleaning the cat’s litter box and I thought that was bad.

          It does make sense that most people who die – from beasts or other accidents – die owing to their stupidity. Darwin’s prize.

          Liked by 1 person

  3. Bugs creep me out too mARA, ESPECIALLY SPIDERS. tHEY MAKE ME QUIVER AND CHILL. Sorry for the caps. I did a quick search for home-brew spider repellant, below is what I pasted in for you:

    Make your own home-made organic anti-spider solution. Just add a tablespoon of citronella oil or peppermint to a quart of water. Pour this mixture into a spray bottle. Spray the solution anywhere you want to get rid of spiders. The solution kills spiders on contacts and also keeps them away.

    Hope this helps!!

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    1. Oh wow, that repelent actually sounds like something I could do with what I have at home! Thanks for the advice πŸ™‚

      No sight of spiders or moths for the last two days here, I hope it will last.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. I’m sorry the cat was traumatised by your trauma. At least you are even now. The spray works, you should try it. Peppermint will keep ants away too. I don’t mind spiders – they eat the other bugs. At night they spin their webs to catch them. They really are quite extraordinary. Their webs are works of exquisite art. But I have a son who is arachnophobic so I know where you’re coming from. I have no solution for moths except for those zappy things that execute them. Problem is, you then need to dispose of the bodies. Ugh 😦

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    1. It’s just as you put it – my cat was traumatised by my trauma πŸ˜€ I’m over it now, since both the spider and the moth disappeared, but I’m sure I’ll be freaking out again when it happens next time. It’s hard to help it. I surely appreciate that spiders and other bugs have a place in this world – and you’re right that spiders’ webs are exquisite! – I just don’t want to coexist with them in the same space.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I get it, they’re sticky and icky when you walk into them! I saw a David Attenborough nature special last night insect eating mammals. You need to get a bat, They munch moths for breakfast, lunch and dinner !

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  5. Hi Mara,
    Nice post again.
    I too have an irrational fear of moths, or any creature that can fly, for that matter–including bats, humming-birds, butterflies and airline pilots. There is something eerie and not quite right about being able to flit around in three dimensions. I am, however, completely untroubled by and actually quite fond of any bug that is earthbound. As a child, I kept woodlice as pets.

    I wonder if you would be so kind as to help me.
    I am trying to post an image on my blog but, as is usual for me with anything beyond numbers and text, the task is totally defeating me. Is there some, like, really easy way of doing this that will not unduly challenge a blogger whose IT skills have not progressed much beyond those of the early 1990s?

    Thanks for keeping blogging. Your posts always cheer me up!

    Paul.

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    1. Thank you, Paul, for your lovely comment! Though I have to admit I Googled woodlice and was mildly disgusted – fortunately, images of bugs don’t bother me that much πŸ™‚ It’s the same with me, I’m most scared of things that can fly – not birds of planes – but things like moths. It’s that their movement is unpredictable and they can get in my face, a scary thought.

      Ok, I’m not that great with WordPress’s current post editor – I still use the old admin – but I did find you a link explaining how to add images, hope it helps! Here you go: https://en.support.wordpress.com/images/adding-images-to-posts-or-pages/.

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      1. Thanks, Mara. The link was very helpful and the process much easier than I had imagined. I also found out that I had saved the image as a .bmp file, which this system post editor doesn’t support.

        I was glad that you liked my post about spelling conventions. I value your opinion very highly and miss the poetry workshops.
        Keep blogging!
        Paul.

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        1. Great to hear that the link helped a bit! Apart from the incompatible file extension…

          Well, I’m not being too creative these days, no poems and no photos either, but perhaps there will be a break? Let’s see!

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  6. At least you don’t have these tiny blood sucking vampires called mosquitos. There’s thousands of them in the woods in the summer. The noise they make is terrible. Especially when they try to get into your ears.

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    1. We do have mosquitoes here too, but not too many and when one gets in the flat, I have this simple electrical device which releases poison when plugged in, and it’s pretty effective. So mosquito-wise, I’m good πŸ™‚ Wishing you a mosquito-free summer!

      Like

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