What I Hated the Least Today 220/365: Not-Date


I’ve been to a not-date with a fellow patient from the psychiatric ward. (An intriguing premise, right?) His diagnoses include but are not limited to depression, alcoholism and asocial tendencies. (Getting interesting, huh?) I share the same diagnoses, minus alcoholism, plus anxiety. (Gotta have something extra, you know.) Nothing of note happened. (Anticlimactic, I know.)

On my not-date, I had not-coffee. That is, tea. The asocial alcoholic, let’s call him John Doe, had tiny coffee, in which he dipped his biscuit British-style. I ate my biscuit dry and was disappointed that John hasn’t given me his. I’m used to gifts of coffee biscuits from the mental ward because all the patients, on learning these are my faves, would bring me theirs in an attempt to fatten me up. (Didn’t work out.)

John is mildly scary and appreciates my morbid sense of humour. Hence, to start with, I observed that should he wish to drag me in a dark alley and kill me, he can feel free to do so because, being depressed, I wouldn’t be particularly upset to be dead. John didn’t feel like it. So we proceeded to sit in a smokers cafe and discuss the delightful graphic images on cigarette packages, which are probably intended to discourage smokers but which cheer me up.

I neither loved nor hated my not-date. However, as I’m socially isolated, I welcomed the opportunity to socialise, be it with an asocial person or not. My therapeutic programme involves at least one face-to-face social interaction per week, so I was pleased to have fulfilled my duty for the week. That’s how I go about my therapy – I duly do what I’m supposed to, and it does nothing for me, besides a rather weak and short-lasting satisfaction when I cross an item, like social interaction, off my to-do list.


Author: Mara Eastern

I'm a sardonic blogger, snapper, scribbler and rhymer; a virtual space invader who indulges in cheerful negativism, morbid self-deprecation and bleak humour.

23 thoughts

  1. Well you are one up on me..I can’t get, haven’t tried actually for a date for so long I think computers were about the size of my bedroom…..so good for you taking the dr orders to an end…..I think wishing your not-date might have killed you seems a bit anit-climatic but then from what you say anti-climatic seems the way these things go..I think….my memory of such things is shrouded in a fog being it was so long ago….but thanks for sharing your therapy with me…..


    1. Haha, no worries, it wasn’t an actual date, it was a friendly meet-up, but it’s always a bit questionable when the persons involved are of the opposite sex and know each other quite intimately, considering they spent two months together in a madhouse, discussing highly private topics, as follows from the nature of the madhouse setting. Now I’m mildly concerned that only people whose company are tolerate are those with mental issues like me. Shall I ever have an actual date, I certainly won’t fail to report on it 😉


  2. So an uneventful not-date apart from earning a tick on the check list. That’s good 🙂 I look forward to hearing about your next face-to-face if you decide to share the experience. Oh btw, if I had one of those biscuits, I would be delighted to let you have it 🙂


    1. Awe, thank you for your virtual share of biscuits! I love these so much, they are caramel biscuits that typically go with coffee when you order one in a cafe here. I also love cookies. Obviously.

      I’ll keep you posted about my further ventures on my to-do (or to-meet) list. Today, actually, looks like another day when I’ll have to go out and meet people. I’m very disinclined to do so, but I’ll have to do it and convince myself that it’s ultimately good for me. sigh I wish I were more sociable.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. “coffee, in which he dipped his biscuit”
    What?!? You can’t dip your biscuit in coffee. That guy is not a keeper. He has deeper issues than depression, alcoholism and asocial tendencies.
    Coffee biscuit dipping for starters.


    1. Haha, no, he’s not a keeper for sure, but whoever invites me for tea, I’ll go. I’m so cheap 😮 I don’t get why anyone would want to turn something dry and crunchy by definition into something wet and soft and mildly yucky. But then I don’t get people in general.


    1. I follow doctor’s orders and do social interaction, against my better judgement. So far, it’s doing nothing for me, but I was advised to be patient. Oh well. The Scottish island for sale is now on my Christmas wish list. Awesome.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Your writing is just so superbe… Glad to read you got along with your not-date. Never had one of those before. Or maybe, yes. Depends on what you want to call a “date”, which, in my opinion, is one of the most ridiculous inventions of the English language…^^


    1. Oh my, thank you so much for your compliments! I think not-dates are not so common as regular dates. It was a friendly meeting of two psychotics 😉 I never thought of that before but you are right, why the heck is a date called a date, it’s weird!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. It is!!! Everyone has another understanding of “date” and it makes everything SO complicated… instead of just naming it accurately. F.e., you can “date” someone, but bring another “date” to another place. Which means something completely different. I’d say it brings a lot of misunderstandings and I’m just happy I live in Europe where everything is called differently and just the way it is 😀


        1. Haha, I’m sure even our respective languages have many confusing words! (Though right now I can’t think of any.) By the way, the other day I read that English is the language with the largest vocabulary. Interesting…

          Liked by 1 person

          1. …seriously?! I can’t believe that… I would have said, hm, I don’t know, anything but English 😀 Don’t the Iceland people have xx different meanings for rain? Or the Irish? Interesting indeed…^^
            Funny enough – just before I found a Czech fella on Youtube singing perfectly translated popular songs of an old Swiss troubadour… My Czech is very limited 😉 but apparently his translations are brilliant and most even rhyme on the same vowels as in Swiss German 😀


Say what?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.