I’m now certified to perform acts of reckless cruelty on children and adults—by teaching them English. My certificate for teaching essentials by British Council arrived electronically today. For my certificate, I was forced to submit to acts of extreme cruelty myself by participating in a moderated online course. It was moderately horrendous, as most things in
Month: January 2016
Today is the grand day when I, for the first time in my memory, cooked a dish which was marginally edible. I hate cooking, but I love eating and since I grew tired of cold buffet meals, I was reduced to attempt the wooden spoon. Typically, I produce versions of tasteless pasta, hard rice, overcooked vegetables and burnt
This is about the cat. Again. But I swear it’s a cat story the like of which you never heard before. My cat woke me up, as usual, at an ungodly (and unmanly) early hour of the morning, when she was amusing herself by chewing the blinds. I’m not at my finest when disturbed from
In response to Laura Feasey’s Literary Lion challenge: Pool. The old man didn’t like doing that. But someone had to. It had been raining and the old corroded tub in the backyard was half-filled with dirty water. That would do. It was about time too. They were already starting to crawl, squealing like rats as
The more I sleep, the more exhausted I feel. However, I’ve run out of food and I figured it wouldn’t boost my stamina to die of starvation. So, while yesterday I was high on Ibuprofen, today I administered Speed 8 (not the speed, but the ultimate legal mind and body stimulant) and unenthusiastically ventured out to get groceries.
Trams come and go Stopping on the go Crawling tediously Counting meters As they go